Thursday, June 25, 2020

So it is now the end

So it is now the end
You did your best, well done for that.
Life didn't really go your way.
I think you could have done more, I think you know that too.

But is this my fault?

What was the point, you know that moment
When you knew it was just not working anymore
What was the point, I ask all the time

You didn't say anything, just got more depressed.
Finally you had enough

It was just too much for you.

Now too much for me

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

The Truth

Was it not, that  it was not true
But that it was not as true as you?
But when was it true?

A lie at the start, grow to the monster.
Now swallowed up but the truth, not as much.

Best be off now, hope you will be well.
As the truth will hurt, for years to come.

Could have been saved, why on earth not?

Unusual People

Unusual People
A local, bare man crys
at the perfect hill

Thursday, June 18, 2020

Chips

That storm hit hard, not in the forcast.
You were only going out for me. I had to have it NOW.
Why didn’t I tell you to wait, tomorrow would have been fine.

The police said it came out of nowhere, nothing you could have done.
Washed away with the bridge, gone forever, never mine again.

All for a packet of chips.
I didn’t get them anyway.

But When

In doing what we have to do
To find something which will work
Make us normal
Fit us in to a box
Any box will do

But 

The medication 
For our Depression 
Mentally analytically 
Waiting for the judgement 
Of what we will face

When

The resulting physical expression
Of our mental pain
Will never be forgotten
Forgiven
Our life never to be the same

But when?
Who knows?

What Is Depression Like

He sits on the steps

Depression is like Depression.

It can feel like you are walking in the darkness while everybody else is walking in the light
It can feel like everybody else “gets it” while you are blind
It can seem you are alone, no matter how many people are around you
It can seem you are just too much trouble for other people to care

You might lose interests in things that you used to enjoy
You might lose touch with those around you
You might say things you would normally keep to yourself, in your own head
You might say you want to be alone, when really all you want is to be close to people

People might describe you as:
Moody
Sad
Angry
Tense
Withdrawn
Aggressive
Negative

Sometimes you might get angry about things that don’t really matter
Sometimes you might cry for no reason
Sometimes you could have a good day, that does not mean you are better
Sometimes you could see some light in between all the darkness

More than anything Depression steals your hope 
Your hope that you will ever get better 
Your hope that things will ever improve
Your hope that this will not last forever

Depression is like Depression.

He sits on the steps

Will his friend come today?
People passing by, looking at him
He tries to smile, his smile is broken
Just like his heart

Kids playing on the grass
Families out walking, happy, enjoying life
He had a family once, before they forgot about him

Sitting for hours, the day coming to an end
Pulling his coat a little tighter
Trying to keep the cold air out
His friend has still not arrived
The street lights come on
A kind lady approaches him, looks at his bracelet

Shortly the bus arrives and two nurses come to get him
Back on the bus and taken back to the home
They are mad with him, how did he get out this time?
They tell him that his friend is dead; he has been for 15 years
He knows his friend is dead, everyday he is reminded of that

For years they would met on the steps, every day at noon
Lunch together and a stroll around the park
He is trying to go back to that happy time
It will never happen